Once AGAIN, the ‘My Life is a Seinfeld Episode’ theory was proven true yesterday!  This ACTUALLY happened.  While this post may get long, due to necessary detail, I think you’ll find it’s worth the wait…the mere ‘Really?’ that you’ll be left with will be worth it.

THE SETUP
-Beautiful Sunday afternoon in SCV
-After lunch, Holly and I decide to go Richard Rioux park in Stevenson Ranch to read/study and enjoy a Sabbath rest overlooking the valley
-The park is large.  The main section is with all the kid structures etc. The other section is fenced and can be reserved for weddings etc (it has a stage).  We set up shop in the gated area (a little more peaceful and away from all the kids). 
-Aside from the cuddling lovers off in the distance, Holly and I were relatively undisturbed for over an hour
-Holly was sitting Indian Style reading and I was laying on my stomach reading; both on the same oversized blanket

PICKING UP SPEED
-Eventually, several different people came in and out of the area: kids on bikes, people and their dogs, etc.
-I didn’t pay any attention until I looked over to my right and saw 2 large dogs (1 retiever and 1 mastiff/pit ?) charging at Holly and I, full steam ahead.  They looked happy, but they’re stranger dogs to us.  AND, Holly is terrified of dogs.
-I immediatley am on my knees and deflect the retiever, but the mastiff is on me licking and wagging, etc.
-Everything happening quickly and Holly looking very uncomfortable and not dog-friendly, I grab him, pet him and send him on his way…the owner is watching and says nothing.  Not a ’sorry’ or anything.
-The dogs run away and Holly is creeped out and now my hand smells like sick dog and we both comment  (chuckling) that ‘wow, not even a ’sorry’ or anything.  weird’
-Holly has to rearrange her study set-up cuz the dog commotion dissheveled it all
-We return to our respective activities
-About 5-10 minutes pass and the dogs come charging again, this time from behind.  I yell at them to get away etc. and the mastiff keeps charging, so I deflect him  with my foot in his chest.  I shove him off.  I think the retriever jumped on Holly (I’m pretty sure that’s how the paw print ended up in her microbiology book). 
-At this point, it’s clear to any onlooker, that we are NOT welcoming the dogs into our area and that we do NOT want them to be near us.
-The owner calls for the dogs and says nothing to us
-We continue in our activities and comment with bewilderment about the owner’s rudeness
Sidenote: the owner is a big man, maybe 6 ft, about 200lbs, shorts, t-shirt, baseball hat and has 2 little kids riding around on bikes.  We’re going to call him Angry Elf (AE)
-Through the next 10 or 15 minutes, we hear another man, with a leashed dog (small) ask AE to call his dogs off (we turn around and his dogs keep hassling the leashed pet).
-AE yells something rude to the guy and does not get his dogs.  In fact, AE yells to the other guy to shut the gate so that his 2 (un-leashed) dogs don’t get out and how it’s a dog park…kind of like ‘get over the fact my dogs are uncontrolled and harassing your dog’
-I turn around and see AE not paying attention and see the other guy swoop his own dog up, as AE’s 2 dogs are charging him.  He looks around to AE, who is ignoring it.  The leashed dog, in his owner’s arms is carried off through the gate and they are now gone.

Now, at this point, I’m kind of irritated with how rude AE is.  And Holly is now beyond ‘muscling through’ her fear.  So, I tell her that I’ll say something if it happens again…

IT HAPPENED AGAIN
-About 5 minutes later, I see the dogs charging us.  I get up, yell at them to go away and then yell across to AE ‘Sir, could you please get your dogs off of us’.  He calls the dogs (no apology) and then yells something like ‘this is a dog-park’.  And then I yell, ‘And it’s also for humans too’.
-Now I lay back down and I’m more than irritated and I’m pretty sure that there’s going to be another interaction.
-Being the seeker of accuracy, I get on my Treo and look up whether or not this really is a ‘dog park’ which leads me to speaking with the sherrif.  That conversation yielded this info: whether or not it’s a dog park, the owners still need to follow the posted rules AND regardless of dog park status, dogs are not allowed to jump on people etc.  He wanted to send a unit out.  I said it probably wasn’t necessary and that the purpose of my call was to get accurate info on leash laws in parks.  We exchange a few laughs, he takes all my info and we hang up.
-AE is on the side of the park where the sign is posted.
-I walk out of my gate in order to go read the sign and confirm or deny what the proper protocol is and what’s legal for this situation
-I don’t close the gate (kind of on purpose, which I shouldn’t have done) and AE yells at me ‘Hey, can you shut the gate’
-I ignore him as I continue walking towards the sign (which is near him)
-He yells at me again and I say ‘What?”
-He repeats himself again ‘Can you shut the gate’ and I say ‘Why?’
-He sarcastically yells, ‘So the dogs don’t get out-this is a dog park’
Here’s roughly how the conversation progressed (insert being interrupted etc. and AE’s instantly aggressive and hostile tone…he’s yelling the entire time…we’re less than 15 feet from each other..I’m standing in front of the sign that has all the rules)

ME-Is it really?  That’s why I’m walking over to read the sign to confirm it
AE-It’s right there on the sign, dog park (which was NOT on the sign)
ME-My friend is terrified of dogs, so we’re just…
AE-then why don’t you move 20 yards outside the gate
ME-Even though we were here first?
AE-It’s a dog park; my dogs aren’t bothering you
ME-So, the 3 times they’ve jumped on us and my friend is terrified of dogs, that’s not bothering us?
AE-Whatever (mumbling some swear words)
ME-Actually, the sign says right here (and I point) that the city ordinance requires that your dogs are leashed (now he’s yelling over me and making rude remarks and sticking with his ‘dog park’ assertion)
ME-Sir, it says right here the dogs must be leashed
AE-then call the cops
ME-oh, actually I did.  And the sherrif confirmed it.
AE-(mumbling rude things) have a nice life (and turns his back to ignore me…dogs still running around)
ME-Sir, I’m not trying to be antagonistic, I’m just trying to…
AE-Yes, you are, you were from the minute we got here (or something to that affect)
ME-(inner monologue: ‘Really?  Is he really serious?) Sir, as long as they’re not jumping on us…
AE-Fine then we’ll just leave because you can’t…. (mumbling and yelling for his kids and telling them they have to leave because of me…)
I walk away and he keeps sarcastically yelling ‘Have a nice life’…Holly hears his kids ask ‘daddy, are we going to be arrested?’

I walk back to our area, lay down and am dumbfounded at what just happened…but kind of laughing at how ridiculous it was.   If that’s what a beautiful Sunday afternoon with your kids at a park looks like…yikes, I wonder if he’s a mean drunk.  I’m also guessing that he won’t be up for ‘parent of the year’ kudos.  What’s ironic is that it will probably be his kid that gets himself kicked out of my classroom in about 5 years for being disrespectful ..you wants to put money on that?

About 30 minutes later, Holly and I decide to leave and as we’re pulling out, to our surprise, the sherrif is pulling in.  We stop and touch base.  He asks questions.  We answer.  He’s surprised at the level of un acceptability and is glad we are ok.  Ahhhh, Sabbath rest.

PS-It’s not a dog park.  It’s a park where dog’s are allowed to be if they’re leashed.